To be honest, I wasn't quite sure what I was going to write about tonight. I was trying to look back at how my day was and it seems as if there wasn't much to talk about. Not that it was uneventful, if anything, it was quite peaceful and productive but maybe I just got used to that busy, crazy schedule. Nevertheless, I'm thankful for this day, a wonderful way to start the week because last week... was just terrible!!!
I don't know how many times, I've snapped at people at work. It seemed as if there's nothing but negativity and frustration coming out of my mouth. How many times did people ask me if I was alright or why I looked so stressed out. And during our morning huddle, I listen to myself speak and it sounded as though it was someone else. I'm not usually that way. I don't know what got into me. Right after I utter the words, remorse follows but you know sometimes you could not take your words back. You just can't!
My days went by fast and yet it seemed as if I never got to finish the things I needed to do. I worked so hard and at the end of the day, I still have that feeling that it wasn't good enough. I needed to strive harder. I got back from my day off thinking I was ready for whatever they throw at me then I got a number of emails telling me how we are not doing well in several areas. I then asked myself, what am I doing wrong??? What is going on??? I thought I was good at what I was doing and yet I can't make my team win...
Saturday morning came and I planned on sleeping in since I don't have to go to work. But a thought woke me up... It's 8:30 am and none of the tellers will be at the branch because I have forgotten to call or send text messages to tell them that there will be a meeting. Believe me, I didn't know what to do. How could I have forgotten?!?! But rather than dwelling on it, I just let it go. At that point, I really couldn't have done anything.
So I decided I would leave my work stuffs in my car. Out of sight, out of mind. I tried to relax and not think about work, at all. But I guess, the grouchiness was still there. A friend of mine who I was exchanging text messages with randomly asked me if I was having a bad day because he claims, he could feel the "vibes". Really??? Am I that transparent? So I stopped and paused for awhile and let myself get "bored". Crazy huh?
Why would I want to get myself bored??? Because I have learned that it's the only way you can calm down your overactive mind that is constantly waiting for something to do or something to work on. I am sometimes too scared to just sit still that I always want to have something to keep myself busy. But I have realized that the beauty of doing nothing sometimes is it helps clear my mind. It gives my mind the freedom to "not know" because just like our bodies, our minds needs a break from our hectic routines. If it gets the break that it needs, it becomes sharper, more focused and maybe creative. And that's exactly what happened today.
I was able to finish up our June schedule. It may not be perfect and needs tweaking here and there but it's amazing how I was able to get that done in just a couple of hours. That felt really good. I was able to interact with my co-workers, had a decent lunch, didn't have that much carry forward for tomorrow and left the branch on time. Now, this is what I love. And that's probably the reason why I'm so passionate about my job.... It's because of the moments like this.
The last chapter I read encourages you to write heartfelt letters. I love to write notes the same way I love receiving snail mail. That's the reason why I always ask my family and friends who travel to send me a postcard. Usually they think I'm joking around but I really love getting notes and letters. It's the idea that someone took the time to share their thoughts and feelings with you by writing you a letter or a note. And because it is something written, you can relive the moment over and over again if you wanted to. Nowadays, we are so used to the convenience of emails and text messages but nothing beats old school notes may it be on a card, a note pad or a post it.
Every now and then I write my co-workers. When they get to their station, I either leave them a post it or a card. And when I see them smile, the feeling is priceless. So I challenge you to write someone a heartfelt letter. Not only does it make you feel good, it also makes the recipient feel special too. Aww... Just the thought of it makes me smile already... I shall write a lot of notes tomorrow.
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