Me Time

A chapter from the book I'm reading suggests that we set aside some quiet time, everyday. How important is this to you? And what do you do to achieve this quiet time? So, where do I begin?

I remember when I was in high school up until I was in college, I sleep really early. Actually it's more like I take a nap. I sleep when I know everyone else is still awake and that's right around 8 pm and wake up close to midnight when it's quiet and there's no one else awake but me. That's when I study and do my projects. That's when I am able to understand things easily and it seems as if my brain is a sponge that just absorbs everything I read. That's also the time when all my creative juices ooze out so whether it's writing a paper or doing an art project, it just comes out so inspired. I miss those days.

Back then, I am able to wake up early, around 4:30 am even if I don't really have to leave the house until 7 am. I just love being ahead of the game. I want to take my time getting ready. I take a shower, have some coffee, watch some news and have that feeling that I have done what I needed to do before it gets crazy. I miss those routines as well.

Now, good luck finding me home by 7:30 pm. And when I am home, I'm so tired but I still need to tend to my son. Poor Patrick.... Then I eat dinner and I try to spend time with them by watching a few TV shows. But even with that, I don't seem to have the patience to stay put. I would choose to go to my room and turn on my computer and eventually go to bed. I no longer have the energy to do anything else. Thus, my house is a mess. That is so annoying!!! To make it worse, I have a hard time getting up early in the morning too. I just have enough time in the morning to get ready and to get my son ready for school. Time goes by way too fast for me.

The only quiet time I get really is my drive going to and from work. That's a good hour one way for myself. Depending on my mood, I would either listen to happy music or get up and dance music. There would be times too when I don't turn on the radio at all. I would probably pray the rosary and finish all 15 mysteries. That's the only time I have for myself.

During the weekends, even if it would save me some time if I just stay at my mom's apartment which is closer to where I work, I choose to go home because it feels good to have the apartment all to myself. I get to watch whatever shows I want to watch. I get to sleep on the couch. I don't have to talk to anyone. I don't need to think of anyone else but me. It sounds kind of selfish but being that I deal with people everyday, I think I really need this.

I've always considered myself as a loner. I prefer being by myself and being quiet. Good luck trying to get me out of the house for lunch or dinner or just to hang out. Something with my personality where in I can only be emotionally available to a few people. Probably that explains why I am not good with human interaction. If you really know me, you would notice that I prefer sending text messages, chatting or sending emails than to actually talk on the phone more so in person. And yet I work in a place where human interaction is a must. Probably that's why I feel so drained at the end of the day.

I can't wait until my vacation which would be a month from now. Although I know it is meant to be spent celebrating Patrick's graduation, I will probably need to take a day or two being away from it all and be by myself again. I need it... before I completely lose myself to this ever demanding life.